As some of you know I'm studying yoga. I will get my teaching certificate pretty soon. And I just did some special training around yoga therapy. Along with the physical postures there's a lot of discussion about philosophy. I'm too skeptical to be into a lot of woowoo but I do think it's important to live consciously, with awareness and full ownership of what I do. In yoga classes we talk about ownership of our thoughts. Our feelings. And of course our actions. It struck me tonight that while we talk of the dogs we own how many of us really consider what ownership means in terms of responsible choices as far as their welfare is concerned? Without blame and other excuses?
My daughters and I took the remaining four to a puppy class tonight. Its focus is on pure socialization. A conformation handling class offers some of this but this is really in their face interaction with lots of different shapes and sizes of dogs and people, as well as ramps and things with wheels and all sorts of textures and other stimuli. They also help get us started on some clicker training and simple commands such as "sit" and "down."
I got a discount having more than one dog but not for all of them since only two will be staying long enough. In the end it will cost $200 for 4 weeks of classes for two of them and 2 weeks for the other two. But it's so important at this age between 8-16 weeks that they get exposure to as many different people and experiences as I can possibly provide.
While there something was emphasized I really thought important to pass on to those of us with more than one dog and particularly those of us with littermates where the bond is established from birth. It was said that for every hour dogs have together they need 5 hours of time with their humans. It was said that ideally this should be each dog in alone time with us. You do the math. More than 2 dogs and you run out of daylight pretty quick. Hold a job that takes us away from them for the better part of the day and it's just an impossible standard to uphold.
So what happens is things like this are said, not to be a hard and fast rule, but rather a way to make a point. And I have to ask myself how many dogs do I have real time for? How fair is it to ask my daughters and husband to help when this hobby is my idea? When I have a few other aspirations and goals set for myself too?
My family is pretty willing luckily. In fact the one least fond of beasty things with lickery tongues announced she had a great time tonight. And as I lay them all down to sleep I found all my young, both canine and human, went to bed tonight without complaint and quickly fell asleep.
But here I am awake and wondering if I can keep my life and everything and everyone I care about in it balanced, flexible and strong...
I'm told it starts with caring for myself and that quite likely starts with a healthy amount of sleep. So now I turn off the light. Good night.
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1 year ago
16 comments:
You are correct Le'o. It's very difficult to have good time with each dog -- especially if you are single and your kids are grown. I have the good fortune (I think) to have my own business and to have an office in a dog-friendly complex. So someone comes to work with me nearly every day. However, even with just two dogs here, I know they don't get five hours of me every day.
I question whether that time quantity is accurate, i.e., based on any scientific studies, but I think the principle is. Our dogs do need time with us to become or to remain responsive and responsible members of the household.
. . . wish I had the answer.
Each dog does need time, but I'll debate that every dog needs a full 5 hours. When they are young and in training I could see where it would be beneficial. But a 13-year-old blind dog who really just wants to be left alone and sleep? No.
I am willing to bet that there are few people in this country who have a full 5 hours free to spend on even one dog. Huxley spends many hours per day with me as he goes to work, but those aren't productive training hours. Those are laying-under-the-desk hours (which is just fine with him). Would it make a big difference if there were two dogs laying under the desk sharing the time? I don't think so.
If we place impossible standards on ourselves for dog ownership, we will always find ourselves lacking. Are we then playing into the hands of animal rights activists, giving credibility to the stance that people shouldn't own pets at all?
Like I said I am not adopting the numbers as a hard and fast rule but I do appreciate the point. It's kind of like the concept of "quality time" with one's kids. If both parents worked it was admonished that you make each moment a meaningful event. Now they're saying if you just have dinner together a few times a week you're good. Real quality time is being fully present while you're with someone. Undistracted.
I think all my dogs can be in the same room with me sharing my time and if I am *with* them mentally there's a hugs difference than if I am involved in other things... like blogging and writing emails all day for example. :-D
I have noticed my dogs know the difference.
So now I'm going to go and see what all the stampeding is about upstairs. :-D
And of course I find a pee spot...
it wasn't a puppy either.
sigh. and LOL.
I think my rationale is when you look around and see too many dogs in crates or kennels all day and all night then you have too many. My roomate at Atlanta is planning on leaving her dogs at the show site overnite, and I was like why? I think the fine line is when the dogs stop being a part of your family and just simply become a vehicle, a possesion a commodity etc. that is when you have to worry.
Seriously, I'll agree with Kaye.
But to inject a little levity:
Oh, wait a minute: that wasn't 5 hours per day per dog. That was 5 hours for each hour the dogs spend together. So if you have 2 dogs and allow them to spend 2 hours together, you'll need to spend the next 20 hours (5 hours x 2 hours x 2 dogs) undoing the damage! I guess the other two hours you'll get to sleep.
Kacy doesn't spend much (awake) time with the other dogs anymore. I'm ok not to spend one-on-one time with her.
Who came up with this theory anyway? I guess we're only allowed to have one dog each or we need to keep them carefully crated and isolated from each other!
I think most of us have the thought that one more won't make a difference but it does when you have multiples. I think Mark and I are lucky, we've found something that we both love and enjoy doing together. Our lives are built around our dogs. doG knows I'm allergic to most two legged individuals.
He takes two to handling class on Tues & and another two on Wed. I take Casper to agility on Wed afternoon and then Wed night it's rally with Casper and a puppy that needs socialization.
But... I see Pearl getting less and less attention and Mirage the unflappable too. And I begin to wonder how fair it all is.
I know they're not abused and are given every ounce of care needed but you stop and realize how much easier it all was with only three in the house.
I really didn't intend for this to be all about the numbers... sigh. I said the numbers don't work.
My real point seems to be lost.
Frznkly, I think when you're at the point with dogs in crates all day it's way past the worrying time and someone should call the authorities because you can't be trusted to be responsible.
I was just talking about checking in with myself and maintaining a balanced life, personal balance. It varies from one person to the next.
Yes the crate/kennel thing is the extreme, but something I unfortunatly have come across, since dipping my toe in this show arena...And I agree a certain number is different for every family situation.
Now for your Yoga certification--Serious Congrats, I really need to start doing that again.
I think your original point is well thought out and well taken.
I do think there is something to be said, however, in maintaining your "pack" to a number where each dog can get enough individual time. I know I am guilty of forgetting to take make the effort to spend "quality" time with my two old dogs. I get so focused on the younger show dogs and the old guys get shoved to the back burner. However, with the loss of many good "senior" dogs this year (Julie, Axel, etc) it reminds me that my time with them is limited. That is why I *try* to make and effort to do something they love. Agility for Sidney, frisbee for Lacey, etc. Notice I said "try". With all my commitments in my life, such as my daughter, my husband, my horse, my new house, etc I find that it is very difficult at times.
But I think, your point, Le'o is that we make ourselves aware and that that is the first and most important step in "conscious dog owning."
The older "trained" dogs (Cardigans) do not require that amount of attention, in fact even the younger ones get tired of dad time long before 5 hours is up...(Are Cardigans even awake for 5 hours each day?) :-)
They also need supervised pack time too, that's how you teach them not to be turds to other dogs ;-)
I also think you would need take into account the breed of dog, Cardigans do not need or demand that much indevidual attention except when they are under 9 months. If you wanted to switch to say Labs they need 5 hours a day or more of work if you are going to do anything with them besides training them to be a foot warmer.
All my dogs let me know when it's time for dad to pay attention to them, nudge nudge...C'mon! throw da ball!!
An interesting post and I agree that we often times get overdogged. I placed my Henry this summer because I could see him slipping onto a higher branch on the attention tree. I know I've given up many activities that I used to do to be able to "hang" with the doggies. Thanks for making me think.
That's why I honestly don't struggle too hard against Dave and his imposed 3 dog limit. With the young kids, 3 dogs is plenty and I'm secretly glad for the excuse to not be able to get "just one more". It does mean that I need to place dogs from time to time and that is hard, but in the end I know I'm not the only one who will love them.
Hopefully we all find our "right" balance!
I have the situation where I can and have brought whatever new babies home without so much as a hiccup out of Thomas. I have had to learn to self-regulate.
Now I'm trying to decide about an "extra" "surprise" puppy.
I need to be cloned or find a way to be in multiple places at the same time. No?
Then I need to simplify. And for some reason that just doesn't seem s much fun.
Le'o, I *constantly* wonder about how to keep everybody I care about balanced, flexible, and strong! It's the good fight, I guess that's the thing to remember. And remember that your dogs love you and would choose to be part of your life -- and they don't count hours, they just love living with you in the moment.
Isn't that why *we* love them?
Introspection must be in season, to say nothing of furry inspiration.
Kindness grows best when we practice on ourselves. Check out my posting at http://justthinkdifferently.blogspot.com/
Food for thought and warm hugs, Le'o. You deserve all the love you shower on your kids (2 and 4 legged). Fill your cup so you can quench the thirst of those you love.
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